Almost two weeks since I wrote a post here and I realised that with a start this morning. How did I let that happen? I love blogging!
But yes, I’ve been busy. No, I don’t mean that in the generic, off-hand way we usually say it. I really have been busy- attending conferences, work deadlines, the kid’s major academic tests and a few domestic concerns plus a short, pleasant getaway last weekend. So, I suppose it’s acceptable to take a break once in a while.
But something’s brewing. A couple of things are, actually but nope, I’m not telling you what they are, just yet. You’ll have to wait a while, maybe a couple of days or longer, to find out.
The more important question I have for you, though, is one I ask myself periodically:
Are you open to change?
There’s a reason I ask this and it’s important that you reflect on this before you answer. Change is terrifying, let’s not kid ourselves. We very rarely take the plunge into something that’s both exciting and daunting and while that’s mostly sensible, there are times when it isn’t.
Why? Not changing at all would mean that you are comfortable being stagnant. Now that’s a rough place to be in. It’s cozy, warm and fuzzy but it’s not letting you grow.
Take the example of public speaking. Now apparently, that’s the #1 fear in the world, bigger than the fear of death! I’ve not had stage fright, even as a child, but I know what it’s like to feel nervous before trying something new. So how do you overcome and even embrace this change?
Take baby steps
You begin by trying something small, in the same league or domain. So perhaps speak to a small audience, even an audience of one person, for example. Slowly, you build up the courage to try larger groups.
Ask for help
Have a friend who will help you through the fear? Rope him in. Ask that he support you and stick by you when you find that your courage falters. Make sure he’s on speed dial, if necessary.
Ask for feedback
I’ve seen a lot of posts recently. Some of them sneer at the idea of criticism, ask that you shut yourself away from the critics and let yourself work your own path. This is a tricky slope, to be honest.
How will you ever grow if you don’t hear honest feedback? While I can understand being turned off by hurtful or mean comments, it may make sense to rope in someone else to confirm if the criticism is really harsh or if there’s a grain of truth in there, somewhere. Perhaps we can then work on it and aim to better ourselves.
So, I ask you again:
Are you the kind who will embrace change?
Oh that makes perfect sense 🙂 But then again, the change that is foisted on us is probably good for us, when you think about it. Shows us how adaptable we are 🙂
Oh I JUST trained Gy to overcome her fear of public speaking 😀 Don’t worry. I’ll train you too. Necessity is a good thing, helps us break free of our constraints.
I know what you mean. Change is inevitable so as much as we may worry about it, it’s going to happen anyway 🙂 Announcement in a few hours from now 🙂
I really am not sure how to answer this question. I resist change that is foisted on me but yet I will seek out change on my own. Does that make sense? Once I see there’s no way out of it I adapt perfectly. So this is slightly strange territory for me.
I can embrace change most times – although I do crib about it, as most of us do. There are some that I’m yet to come to terms with too though; public speaking being still one of them. Maybe some day.
After all, necessity can facilitate the need to change too.
I do like honest feedback though I tend to make my own mind up in the end without getting swayed by other people’s opinion. There’s no point in not liking change since that is inevitable!
Can’t wait to hear your announcement!
Thank you! That’s so sweet of you. And thanks for sharing the inspirational story about the enterprising designer! Hugs.
Change scares me but I do enjoy it many ways. Sometimes, it is about seeing that silver lining in the fears of what change will bring. Taking baby steps is important to get comfortable. I think we make it harder for ourselves by assuming to hit the nail on the head on the first go.
A good, thought provoking post, Shailaja!
I’m always up for change. Places or situations where I think I’m wrong, I readily apologize and welcome criticism with open arms and try to improve the errors I made.
But what bothers me is, too much inclination towards change is bad. It leaves my individuality behind. Too ready to change and adapt to situations does more harm than good to me I feel.
This post was truly thought provoking Shailaja 🙂
Cheers
That sounds like such a positive approach and attitude, Upasana! More power to you ?
I love change- It makes me little uncomfortable in the beginning but it excites me. Change comes with a different set of goals and challenge us to polish ourselves. I am thankful for every change in life.
Waiting to see what’s brewing!
I attended this conference on Saturday and listened to a woman who inspired everyone in the room with her never-say-die attitude. She’s made three changes in her life, taken three sabbaticals and come back stronger each time. Currently she spearheads a jewelry brand that is beautifully Indian and spoke so passionately about it. Here was a woman who not only embraced change but made the best of it all. Your story mirrors that to a large extent. I admire that about you, Beloo, among other things ?
I have made some big changes in life which would have seemed daunting when viewed ordinarily, and especially if I didn’t feel so convinced that the changes were absolutely necessary for my journey. Like leaving my job and going back to doctoral program in another continent. And then after all that hard work, leaving a good professional/academic career at the age of 40 and choosing a semi-retired/retired life (at least in the professional sense) in a small town in another continent where I didn’t/don’t know the language. Change can be daunting and unsettling and discomforting. But so much depends on our attitude toward it and the deeper awareness of why the change is necessary.
Oh yes! Ego and inertia- two extremes and both detrimental to change. Wonder why people fall into the victim trap or the comfort lap and prefer to stay there. Oh I love the addition of ‘read more’. Perfectly put. Reading is one thing that will definitely help us grow.
Change though the only certainty in life is quite daunting. Like you said, we can’t grow if we are not open for change but issues like ego or just plain inertia come in the way. Those are good steps you’ve shared. I will also like to add read more to this list. Read about your craft or the area you work in and often you will feel egged to change your approach, way of working and even mindset.
Absolutely true that. We need to grow. Always. As for the brewing, wait wait ☺
I know it’s frightening and it takes time to warm up to something new. Glad to hear that it’s something you enjoy once you get comfy. And hey you could speak one day. Never say never.
Very true. It’s the fright that keeps us from trying most of the time. Sometimes it’s good to step out and attempt something new.
I guess it depends on what the change is and if it’s in our control. Well, for me atleast, I guess. I like my comfort zone like everyone else but like you said, we can’t grow of we don’t explore and challenge ourselves.
But what’s brewing, woman? Waiting, waiting ?
I usually feel very nervous before trying our something new… but once I get used to notion of change, I don’t really mind. Been long since I have done public speaking. My audience is usually small now, but I would love to once day speak in front of a crowd 😀 I always welcome feedback … it’s actually a fast way to learn 🙂
Change is frightening, even it’s something you’ve been looking forward to. That is, primarily, because we have to leave behind our comfort zones and tackle new circumstances that could be a bit disconcerting. Yet, we do know that changes are inevitable and in fact also the spice of life.